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Broken Hearts?
December
8th,
2006
In the previous column,That Cheating Heart. I illustrated a
number
of
different
ways to
understand
a dream.
The
importance
of this
is that
a dream
can
sometimes
seem to
say
something
quite
particular
about
the
waking
world
and
these
dreams
require
especial
care.
In
this
week's
dream,
the
dream
seems to
accuse
the
dreamer
herself.
Monica's
Dream
I
dream I
am
kissing
Ryan.
(Ryan is
my
friend
Carmen's
boyfriend
and
Carmen
is one
of my
best
friends.)
In
Jack's
dream
last
week,
there
was
always
the
possibility
that
Jack was
mistaken
and Jill
was not
cheating.
Here,
the
dream
Monica
was
unquestionably
enjoying
an
erotic
moment
with
someone
other
than her
fiance,
Gary.
Monica
was
horrified.
The fact
that
this act
occurred
in a
dream
hardly
affected
the
emotional
impact.
She was
planning
to marry
Gary. It
seemed
that she
had
betrayed
her
commitment
to Gary
and her
friendship
with
Carmen.
The
dream
questioned
her core
beliefs
about
her own
loyalties.
In
this
dream,
there
are
three
people
and four
when we
include
Gary.
That's a
complex
situation.
Here,
amongst
the
many,
are some
possible
interpretations:
1.
Monica
is fed
up with
Gary and
is
looking
for
someone
else.
2.
Gary is
fed up
with
Monica
and so
Monica
is
protecting
herself
from
humiliation.
3.
Monica
is
"really"
attracted
to Ryan.
4.
Ryan is
attracted
to
Monica
and
Monica
is
finally
noticing.
5.
Carmen
is
attracted
to Gary
and
Monica
is
punishing
Carmen.
6.
Monica
is angry
at
Carmen
for some
other
reason
and so
punishing
Carmen.
7.
Monica
is
jealous
of
Carmen
and
wants
what
Carmen
has.
8.
Gary is
attracted
to
Carmen
and
Monica
is
reacting
to this.
The
confusion
is
enormous
because
any of
these
explanations
might be
the one
that
makes
sense of
a
situation
that, at
first
sight,
makes no
sense at
all.
When
Monica
discussed
the
dream
with me,
she was
very
clear
that she
liked
Ryan but
didn't
have the
slightest
physical
attraction
to him.
She
didn't
think
Ryan
was, in
waking
life,
flirting
with
her.
What
did come
out,
after a
while,
was that
Carmen,
even
though
she was
a close
friend,
flirted
with all
the
boys,
including
Gary.
Previously
Monica
had
dismissed
this as
just
being
part of
Carmen's
outgoing
personality,
"Just
part of
a
game."
But
when she
thought
about
the
dream,
Monica
couldn't
help
noticing
the
satisfying
thought
that
Carmen
would be
upset if
she
kissed
Ryan.
Monica
hadn't
recognized
how
angry
she was
at
Carmen.
In a
sense,
Monica's
dream
allowed
her to
punish
Carmen
by
taking
Ryan
away,
but only
at the
cost of
doing
something
bad to
herself.
Once
aware of
the
problem—Carmen's
flirting
with her
fiance--Monica
considered
discussing
this
with
Carmen.
But she
felt too
vulnerable
thinking
that
Carmen
would
taunt
her and
make her
look
foolish.
Instead,
she
asked
Gary not
to
respond
to
Carmen's
flirtations.
She also
decided
to
create
some
distance
from
Carmen.
The
dream
also
made
Monica
acknowledge
to
herself
that she
was
aware
that
other
men
still
found
her
attractive.
Vive
Le
Difference
Monica
was
freed of
the fear
that she
and Gary
were
incompatible.
In other
situations,
a
similar
dream
might
well be
an
unpleasant
wake up
call to
the
realities
of the
dreamer's
relationships.
It's
important
to be
able to
tell the
difference.
Summary
When
you have
a dream
that
seems to
make a
waking
life
statement
about
you or
someone
else,
think
twice.
There
are
always
many
interpretations
of a
dream.
If in
doubt,
wait for
the next
dream
and see
what
happens
there.
 DIAL-IN
DREAM
GROUPS
The
Monday
telephone
conference
call
continues.
Whether
you live
far away
or close
by, a
phone
group
allows
you to
get a
sense of
dream
work in
a very
convenient
way.
With
this new
work, I
hope to
communicate
the
pleasure
and the
excitement
of dream
work to
many
people.
- Day:
Monday
December
11th
- Time:
5pm-6pm
Pacific
Daylight
Time
- Dial-in
Number:
620-782-2200
(Kansas)
- Access
Code:
707172#
ELEPHANT PHARMACY WEDNESDAY GROUP
This group will meet again in January. It is
closed
for
December.
(Call in
to the
phone
group on
Mondays
instead).
DREAM GROUPS
The Saturday drop-in group ($20) is from 10
am to
noon at
2315
Prince
Street
in
Berkeley.
The
nearest
major
cross
street
is Ashby
and
Telegraph.
Please
let me
know if
you are
coming.
SHARE DREAM OF THE WEEK
If you enjoy reading Dream of the Week,
please
tell
your
friends
about
it. They
can read
back
issues
and
subscribe
(free)
at DreamOfTheWeek.com.
Best wishes
David
Jenkins
Dream RePlay
email: davidj@dreamreplay.com
phone: (510) 644 2369
web: http://dreamreplay.com
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